On His Shoulders

I had a hard time writing before I left for the weekend. I felt very discouraged and tense and I wasn't sure what I could say that was even an update. I felt a bit lost.

The weather has been dreary and bleak. The winter is officially upon us. The Christmas ornaments and decorations are all put up. There are no sparkly lights to look upon as you drive around the city. No gifts or presents wrapped up with bows and shiny paper. No festive holiday parties to catch up with old friends. All the joy of the season is over and the new year came in with cold and dreary rain. The hard reality that we have to start over and that things may change for 2009 are staring me in the face. The pity party officially began...

I finally had to pull myself out of the funk and realize that the longer I dwell in this negative place the easier it is for the enemy to win. He wants me to become discouraged and he yearns for me to stay in a dreary and bleak place.

However our Shepard is greater than that. One of his sheep had wandered off and got herself stuck in a pit of despair. He left the other 99 to find her and he scooped her up and put her on His shoulders.

Luke 15:3-5 (New International Version)

3Then Jesus told them this parable: 4"Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Does he not leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? 5And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders

From His shoulders I can see so much more and the weight of me carrying my own burdens are lifted because He is carrying me through this storm.

Thank you all for your prayers and emails. It is through you that God is ministering to me and speaking to me. Allowing me to feel that I am on His shoulders.



Amy and her family left Saturday morning. They had a rough trip due to traffic so I think the got back to North Carolina around 8:30 and it took them about 10 hours total. Pray for her whole family (Robbie, Maddie and Trathen) as they get back into the groove. I know she is stressed because she cannot be here all the time but also is trying to balance the demands of motherhood and helping her family stay focused as well.

Blake, Dad and I went to see Mom on Saturday. She was in good spirits which is encouraging and they ran some more tests on her upper arm and it appears that there was a little activity. Earlier the tests came back negative (which also helped my pity party!) but another round of tests came back showing signs of nerve activity. She is getting sick of the hospital and wants to come home badly. All of the patients around her that she had met while she has been in rehab are returning home and I think that makes her even more homesick.

Of course just like my Mom, she has met so many friends and they were all just as sad to leave my Mom. Even her Doctor told her that she had quite the fan club on the rehab floor. I think she was voted Most Friendliest in 1967 at Forest Park High School so the superlative still stands today!

Hopefully she will come home on Friday and I pray that in these next 6 days we will see much improvement to that left arm. My grandmother, Mimi, is going to come down and stay with her at the house so she can help feed her, bath her, etc.. I am thankful that Mimi can make the trip down but I also know that she older herself and I want everyone to rest and recover as much as they can. We are praying for supernatural energy, more than the red bull kind!

Dad goes back to the Doctor this week too. He may get the go ahead to go back to work. I pray he does not overdo it. Dad if you are reading this-TAKE IT EASY. I know he feels like he needs to get back to start getting paychecks for the bills that are mounting but I also know that his own energy level is down.

I think this week will be hard because there are changes facing us but I want to be on His shoulders and not lost in the brush as they happen.