Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Prayer Request

Hey All
I have emailed some of you but here are specific prayer requests I am asking for y'all to join with me in prayer. Sometimes when I look at all these I get discouraged but then instead of putting them down as complaints or problems I realize I need to lift them up to God as prayers and allow him to hear my cry

First my mom's left arm. She currently can shrug her shoulders, move her fingers and move her wrist but she cannot lift her arm. Pray that the nerve damage is not permanent and that she will be able to one day regain full control of her arm.

Pray for healing of the right arm. She has 2 pins in her wrist and that arm is in a full cast. Until that arm fully heals she has to rely on someone to feed her/bath her/wipe her/etc... She is pretty much helpless and it is so frustrating for her

Pray for my Dad's back. He had a lower L1 lumbar compression fracture. He needs to fully heal so that he will be able to care for my Mom when she finally comes home

Pray for all the piling medical expenses and that with Dad being out of work right now and insurance headaches etc...

Also-My sister called and her and Robbie and Maddie are sick with the stomach bug today. Pray that Trathen, Dad and Mom do not get the bug. I cannot imagine the pain it would cause both of my parents to be sick in the bathroom all day and Amy does not need the additional hassle of being sick with a sick baby.

Pray without ceasing- I Thes 5:17

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Miracles Do Happen

I have been thinking a lot lately about the fact that Jesus' ministry was not only teaching people but also healing people. He raised a dead man, healed the blind and deaf, cured those with terminal illness, cast out demons and even caused those that were lame to walk.

Today Mom has been approved for another 7 days of rehab. I saw on the charts before I left St. Mary's last weekend that she was scheduled for January 9th as her release date. I know she doesn't want to stay that long but if she requires that much time for full recovery then by all means we want her to stay.

Amy and her family are at my parents house this week. I am happy that Dad is surrounded by so much love-Amy, Robbie, Maddie, Trathen and even Jackson the dog. I also hope he rests as much as he needs and doesn't over due it.

Mom is schedule to have nerve conduction tests today on that left arm. I asked Blake and he said it is where the neurosurgeon will apply electrodes on her arm to determine any response. Or at least that is how I understood it to mean. They are afraid of cutting down the cast on her right arm too soon because they want that right arm to completely heal first.

Jesus healed those that had the faith to believe. In Mark 2-Jesus healed the lame man. Four men carried their friend who was lame on a mat and cut a hole in the roof and lowered him in. Jesus saw their faith and he was healed.

In Matthew 9:18-26 a woman with a blood disease reached out and touched Jesus cloak just to feel His power and she was immediately healed. Jesus said, "Take heart your faith has healed you."

The list goes on and so do the miracles.

Today join me in having faith like the lame man and his friends or the woman with the blood disease and let us reach out and touch the same power that is offered by Jesus and ask for complete mobility and movement to my Mom's left arm.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

3 week recap

Three weeks ago yesterday was the accident. It's crazy to think about that three weeks ago we had no idea what was unfolding before us. I had no idea I would be coming home every weekend to care for my parents, I had no idea that my Mom would be in the hospital for three weeks, and I had no idea that my holidays would unfold like they have. Three weeks ago, I had not imagined the possibility of having my parents so severely injured that they would require daily care or that my Mom may not regain use of one of her arms. Three weeks...21..days..504 hours.

Time passes quickly and changes right before your eyes. A lot or a little can happen in three weeks. In three weeks I have become completely dependent on God. I have always been a child of God but my faith definitely mirrors the ebb and flow of the ocean. Yet today I am more convinced that He is my comforter, my rock, my refuge, my hope, my strength and my Savior.

We saw Mom every day since Christmas. Each time I would get ready to leave Dad would be dressed and ready to go see her. He misses her terribly and I think it keeps both of their spirits up to see each other. I hate that they are apart. I think the three weeks finally got to Mom yesterday. She said she cried a good part of the morning. I know she hates being in a hospital for that long and I know she hates not knowing when she gets to come home. We all hate it but it must be miserable for her.

She is dependent on people for everything. Someone has to feed her, bath her, hold the phone to her ear, wipe her, dress her, blow her nose, scratch her...the list goes on. It's funny to once again realize that we need to be that dependent on God. We need to seek Him in everything we do. We need his strength to get through each day because when we try to do it on our own we fail or grow tired.

Mom said she was watching It's a Wonderful Life on Christmas Eve and she finally had enough of Bedford Falls and wanted to go to sleep but she couldn't even turn the TV off. She tried to use her foot but kept pushing the TV farther away. Finally she gave up and called the nurse. She felt stupid calling a nurse to turn off the TV but she had no other choice.

There is a lot to learn from that scenario. I need to learn a lot from that scenario. I can't make Mom's arm come back staring at it or talking about it. I can't make Mom come home wishing and hoping. I can only depend on God to heal and restore both of my parents.

Paul said it best:
2 Corinthians 12:8-10 (New International Version)

8Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

God's strength is made perfect in our weakness.

I am asking you to pray with me in the restoration of my Mom's left arm and in her full and complete recovery. In our weakness His strength is made perfect!

I am going home today and will probably not see Mom and Dad again until next weekend. If anyone wants to visit her at St. Mary's and watch the UGA game on Jan 1st I know she'll enjoy the company. I can't come home until the weekend or otherwise I certainly would!

Friday, December 26, 2008

Christmas Update



This was the sunrise on Christmas morning. Dad wanted to leave our house around 7:30 am so we could get to Mom early. On our way out the front door this is the amazing skyline we saw. I grabbed Dad's camera and snapped a shot.

"Because of the Lord's faithful love we do not perish, for His mercies never end. They are new every morning" Lam 3: 22-23

I had just read this verse 2 days ago and the promise was written across the sky for me to see on Christmas morning.

It's funny setting an alarm for Christmas at age 29. We set our alarms for 6:30am. I don't think I have woke up that early on Christmas in a long time. Amy said even her 2 kids who are 4 and 16 months didn't wake up that early. I will be honest, I hit snooze immediately. However, Dad was so ready to see Mom and I couldn't make him wait any longer.

After an hour drive we reached St. Mary's and headed for the rehab floor. Dad spotted Mom immediately. She was sitting in the main eating area and that's when the tears started to fall. It was so good for them to see each other. Tears of joy. We opened presents, laughed, and ate Jesus birthday cupcakes.

We went back to her room and visited for a while and then ate lunch together with some of the other rehab patients and their families. Hospital dressing just isn't the same as your family but everything tasted fine because it really didn't matter. One of the other patients' grandson brought his guitar and played carols in the dining room. We all sang Silent Night, Joy to the World and O Little Town of Bethlehem. It was obvious we were all a bit saddened that this was how we were spending our Christmas. Tears began to fall from all the family members that were surrounding us.

The Chaplin realized it too and she brought to our attention the words from O Little Town of Bethlehem. She mentioned how Christ came into the world to a lowly couple in a manager to a city that least expected the majesty of a King and even now in this hospital we can experience Christmas. Even if you are in a place that isn't typically how you experience Christmas the beauty of the season is that you can experience his Love and Hope anywhere.

O little town of Bethlehem
How still we see thee lie
Above thy deep and dreamless sleep
The silent stars go by
Yet in thy dark streets shineth
The everlasting Light
The hopes and fears of all the years
Are met in thee tonight



We stayed until about 4pm and then headed back-Dad needed to rest and so did Mom. I am pretty sure Dad will ride with me today and see her again. He loves his wife so much and what an amazing example of marital love they constantly are for me.

Our prayer concerns are her left arm-she has no bicep control. She cannot lift her arm but if you lift it for her she has the tricep control to push it back down with your help. Also the wound on her leg that required the staples. It has been leaking lately and has caused some concern. They had to drain 3 liters of blood from it the other day. I know God is the Great Physician and can heal if we simply ask. I struggle with this sometimes and I think this passage in Mark is my own prayer concerning my Mom's injuries:

Mark 9:23-25 (New King James Version)

23 Jesus said to him, “If you can believe,[a] all things are possible to him who believes.” 24 Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!”

Lord, help me with my own unbelief-all things are possible with you!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Christmas Eve Update



This was taken in Jan 1968 according to the Polaroid's caption on the side. My parents got married on September 17, 1967 so it appears this was their first tree in the background. It isn't too Charlie Brown and when you see their faces they don't really care one way or another if their tree is pretty or not-they are irrevocably in love. They are still in love and probably more so 41 years later.

I'm gonna be a complete mess tomorrow when Dad finally gets to see Mom. I will have to take 3 boxes of kleenex to the hospital-one for each of us. You know what come to think of it, despite my physical exhaustion and emotional state of mind-this will be our best Christmas. I hate that my sister won't be there until after Christmas. Although, I know she is so happy that she is a part of this family and that her family is still whole and complete minus a few bumps and bruises.

I read a pretty good Psalm yesterday in the midst of my pity party. Psalms 55. I love that David was so honest with God and that God listened and responded. It's a pretty intense cry to God-I put some excerpts below. My favorite is the last line of the chapter!

1 Listen to my prayer, O God,
do not ignore my plea;

2 hear me and answer me.
My thoughts trouble me and I am distraught

3 at the voice of the enemy,
at the stares of the wicked;
for they bring down suffering upon me
and revile me in their anger.

4 My heart is in anguish within me;
the terrors of death assail me.

5 Fear and trembling have beset me;
horror has overwhelmed me.

6 I said, "Oh, that I had the wings of a dove!
I would fly away and be at rest-

7 I would flee far away
and stay in the desert;

8 I would hurry to my place of shelter,
far from the tempest and storm."

16 But I call to God,
and the LORD saves me.

17 Evening, morning and noon
I cry out in distress,
and he hears my voice.
22 Cast your cares on the LORD
and he will sustain you;
he will never let the righteous fall.

23 ...But as for me, I trust in you.

God heard us, our cry for help, he heard our cries before we even existed and sent his only son down to earth on Christmas to ultimately save us. He has heard me, hears me and will always hear me. I daily am learning to let go and cast my cares on Him and TRUST.

Merry Christmas

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Tuesday's Update

I got misty eyed at lunch....okay scratch that, I cried at lunch when I thought about what my Christmas morning may be like compared to what it has been in the past. I wasn't really crying tears of joy, I think they may be selfish tears or even angry tears. We won't be waking up as a family to Christmas music and Jesus birthday cake, we won't be heading over to my Aunt and Uncle's house for the big Christmas breakfast. No we will be carefully driving an hour to see my Mom in a hospital bed.

I feel bad that I am even upset about that. I should be so thankful that I will be seeing my Mom and my Dad will be seeing her for the first time in almost 20 days. This week has been hard. The drama of the situation has settled and now real life is beginning and I am tired. Although I know your prayers have not ceased, even now the prayers you said at the beginning are still like a sweet fragrance to my family as we mend and heal.

I've been thinking about all the little things today.

It's the little things...the traditions at Christmas that always mean so much. hugs and kisses, smiles on the faces of children when they open gifts, laughter across a kitchen table or in front of the tree, putting out the nativity, hanging your favorite ornament, baking that special dish...

Dad went out today and got a haircut. Don't panic-he didn't drive, his sister took him. He told me just that little outing exhausted him. Such a little thing.

Mom has to have people help dress her, feed her, take her to the bathroom, little daily tasks, little things.

Jesus, a little baby, was born in a manager wrapped in swaddling clothes surrounded by lowly shepherds...seems like such a little thing for such a big moment in time.

The little things..they mean a lot though and usually are followed by something bigger like family, independence, love and even a heavenly host!

“Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger." Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests.”- Luke 2:11-14

Monday, December 22, 2008

Monday's Update

Philippians 4:4 (New International Version)

4Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!

This verse has been rolling around in my head over and over today. I can't make it come out in the tone I know it was meant to be heard though.

My car's check engine light came on today at lunch. Luckily, Blake was free today so he swapped cars with me and took it over to the car place. I had to have a full tune up so of course I just handed over my credit card. I am driving back and forth between Georgia and Alabama so much and then even between Covington and Athens once I get home..so I had to do it.

I just am bummed that it happened now in the midst of all this. I am not out of a car or a days work just out of some money that can be replaced eventually if I manage my budget. Today I haven't cried though-that's a first when it comes to car stuff. I always get frustrated with car stuff. I just think today has been the first day that my attitude has been bad though.

I felt like saying to God-You have got to be kidding me! Really? My car. But then a verse that I read last week and the week before that about Mom and Dad popped into my head-Rejoice in the Lord ALWAYS. My heart isn't quite in the right place yet but I know that I have to loosen my grip on things I can't control and Rejoice.

I have two parents who are ALIVE. My Mom is finally in rehab and hopefully one step closer to home. And now on the bright side I have a car that is tuned up and will run well on my way home Wednesday.

Again I say Rejoice!

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Weekend Update

I got to talk to Mom on my lunch break on Friday and she said she needed a boppy. You know those pillows that go around your waist so you can breast feed your baby. She said it would help her prop up her arms on either side when she is sitting up. I told her Blake and I would swing by Babies R Us on our way to Georgia and buy her one.

I got her one that matched her "nursery" or rather her bedroom at home. I also laughed because it came with a free year's subscription to Parent magazine. I hope that comes in handy for her, seeing is how she is a Mother of a 29 and 34 year old!

We got in around 10pm on Friday. Dad was doing good. He has been surrounded by friends and family from the church and filled with good food. Blake dug right in to help him clean up the kitchen.

Dad said they had moved Mom to rehab already and that she couldn't have overnight visitors but had requested some clothes and photos of her family. It is hard to come home sometimes because part of me wants to stay at home all day with Dad and the other part wants to stay all day at St. Mary's with Mom. You have to balance your time so carefully. Dad's main concern is Mom of course, so he has no problem with us leaving to go see her.

We spent all Saturday morning with Dad and then left after lunch to see Mom. When we got there it was so amazing to see how upbeat she was in her little neck brace and now hard cast. It was truly a 180 difference. She is nowhere near full recovery but she is on her way. The race has begun and I think we are already at our first water stop.

They had just taken out the staples in her neck from the first surgery. The staples in her leg will remain until her bruising goes down. She isn't as black and blue more like purple and yellow now. And the best part of it all is that she talks with her feet. Like I said-we are Italian and since she can't use her arms her little feet go 90 to nothing when she talks.

Seeing this change in Mom reminded me of how we look after we experience Christ...new.


"Therefore if any man is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things are passed away; behold, new things have come." (2 Corinthians 5:17).


New things have come...Its like Christmas morning in a way. You wake up with such anticipation of the new things under the tree wrapped in their enticing bows and paper. The stocking hung with care and filled with candy or gift cards. The new Atari (yes, I said Atari) hooked up to the TV playing Pacman. The new Barbie, toy car, stuffed animal, clothes, phone, etc... the list goes on. But above all the new things to come; the Christ child has come. The Messiah, the new life that will ultimately die on a cross so that we as sinners can become New Creatures...New things have come.

My family is healing and each day will bring new things. I am not giving up hope on the return of her left arm. I hate leaving her because she is more alert now she has more concept of time and she is lonely. I am going back today after we leave Dad and will visit with her one more time before the holidays. It's funny how this year-Christmas really can't come fast enough for me. Not because of any gift I am getting but because I will be home again to see my family.

Friday, December 19, 2008

Friday's Update

Yesterday the hospital lost our Mom? How does that happen? Where does she go? Did she escape? Apparently they needed her room for another patient so they had to move her to a different room but of course no one had clearly communicated that to anyone else so…when Amy, Dad and I called –they were looking to see where she was moved. We all called at the same time in 3 different states mind you. I think the Adams’ family as ESP now. They originally told Dad that she had been discharged to go home?

Dad’s response was pretty much what you are thinking now? This would be impossible considering Dad can’t drive to get her and Mom still doesn’t have a functioning arm on either side. Besides that, she probably is still moving at a snail’s pace so someone should check the lobby to see if she is still inside the building! Be on alert for a tiny Italian lady in a hospital gown wandering the St. Mary’s lobby.

Needless to say-they just switched her rooms and no one had let the right people know but they found her. Whew! Thank goodness.

After finally talking to a nurse and Dad getting to talk to her with a nurse holding the phone, it sounded like she had a bad night on Wednesday. She was in some pain and she can’t call the nurse unless someone puts the nurse call button in her hand. During the shift change her new nurse didn’t know this until they checked her in the morning. So she pretty much suffered through the night.

These are the times when my heart breaks and I can’t be there for her. You know how when you were little and you fell down your Mom had a smile, hug and a Band-Aid waiting. Or when someone hurt your feelings at school because you wore glasses AND braces, your Mom had a smile, hug and sound advice waiting. Or when he breaks your heart and you are too far away at college to come home, you can pick up the phone and your Mom’s voice has a smile and you know she would hug you if she could and she tells you he was a creep anyways. The point being-she was always there. And now when she is hurting and in pain, no one is immediately there for her.

As I type this I am humbled in realizing that actually God IS there. In the pain, in the sorrow, in the stillness of the night He is there. He suffered on the cross so that he could be there with us. He is with me while I ache for my Mom and Dad and he is with them both as they physically ache and I know emotionally ache to see each other.

John 14: 27 “Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Your heart must not be troubled or fearful.”

“Peace on earth, good will to men!”


Mom will have company tonight-a friend from our old church will stay the night with her.

*************** THANK YOU *******************
I also wanted to say Thank You! I was again brought to tears by the thoughtfulness of all of my Birmingham family. I received a generous and undeserving gift last night to cover some of my travel expenses over the course of the next few months. You have no idea how you have touched me. I am thanking each of you personally but I cannot believe you all did that. I love you guys so much and am honored to be your friend.

Blake and I are headed home tonight after work. We will be there just for the weekend. I can't wait to see my Dad and my Mom. I also have a bag full of wrapped presents to place under the tree. I know that in light of everything the presents don't matter so much but I am eager to give back to so many relatives that have helped out this month. I wish I could give them more!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Wednesday Afternoon Update

I talked to Mom today!

I was on my lunch break and Amy called me and said-call Mom in her room. Ann (my Dad's sister) is in there and she will hold the phone to Mom's ear. Her voice has never sounded so comforting to me. I was so happy to hear her little voice when she said hello.

She was alert and aware of what was going on. She even mentioned how she was probably saying some crazy things last week when she was on the morphine. I told her that she kept talking about how Blake wanted to eat 4 pound shrimp. Which really isn't all that crazy if you know Blake but still it didn't make much sense in the context of things.

Anyways-it sounds like we have started the long journey of recovery. Mom may move down to the fourth floor which is the rehab facility at St. Mary's. It should be a good place considering it's the same hospital that works with UGA athletes.

Friday cannot come fast enough so I can head home and see them both!

Exodus 15:26b "For I am the Lord who heals you!"

Wednesday's Update

"Tears are the safety valve of the heart when too much pressure is laid on it" Albert Smith-English Author

My Dad and Mom have always said this quote to me since I was a little girl. Probably when I broke up with my first boyfriend, Jimbo-ha only in Conyers right.

They moved my Mom to a regular room on the Neuro floor last night. I have yet to talk to her or one of her nurses. I have her room number but I am afraid to call because she could be sleeping or how can she even answer the phone with no functioning arm at this point. I may try to call later today or at least try the nurses station.

Dad sounded like he was doing good this morning and I think each day he improves. His cousin works in Athens so she went to visit Mom and when they started talking about my Dad, my Mom started to cry. In a weird way this seems like good news to both Amy and me. I haven't seen my Mom cry since the accident. She almost was too in shock, or too out of it to even cry. She saw me and Amy cry multiple times in front of her and she didn't even blink once. I knew she was either in too much pain or not aware of the severity of the situation to cry. So if Mom is crying then maybe Mom is getting better.

Weird to think about it but to have Mom cry used to worry me. I would think she was dealing with depression, upset or even angry but now having Mom cry seems like a step towards more healing.

Matthew 5:4 "Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted"

Today God hears my Mom's cries and He will comfort her.

I think she may go to a rehab floor at St. Mary's-not sure when but even if she is there over Christmas my parents will see each other. Can you imagine it would be the first Christmas in over 41 years of marriage that they would miss?! They have to see each other. The picture I posted is of them at Christmas when they were dating in the mid 1960's. Dad gave Mom a sweetheart chest-it's still in our house today. You can see the stocking on the right side filled with goodies. I hope this Christmas my family will be like that stocking and be filled with joy and rejoice in the good news from their recovery and our Savior's birth.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Tuesday's Update

I talked to Dad last night and we were both discouraged. As of last night Mom had not really improved and her pain level was about the same. My Dad's sister, Ann, went to visit her and she said she wasn't very alert and didn't really make much sense when she was awake.

We knew she wouldn't be moved to a regular room yesterday. I think all of us, Amy included felt really down about her situation. I only saw days and weeks of Mom in a sterile hospital hooked up to every possible machine. I hated not being able to really talk to her and the thought of having my Mom in an incoherent state for another week or so discouraged and depressed me more.

Dad said that he got really homesick and started to feel really sad about Mom so he read the sermon notes from a First Baptist of Atlanta, Dr. Stanley message on Anxiety. He said if he continued to stay in the word and hear the truths from scripture then he knew he would feel better and not allow fear or negativity enter in.

The first verse he read was so appropriate:
Philippians 4:8 (New American Standard Bible)

8Finally, brethren, (A)whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.

I had to reread that several times this morning. I didn't have it in me to call the NCCU again today only to be told she showed no signs of improvement. Instead I called Dad and decided to just wait. I called Dad back at lunch and he said that Mom seems to be doing better today. The nurse even said-well it looks like you have a sparkle in your eye today! He said that one of the church members called him and told him that Mom had her eyes open the entire time they visited with her and she seemed very alert. So much so that she asked them to tell Dad that she has a Belk's bill in her Bible that needs to be paid! That sounds just like my Mom-so that has even helped me have a sparkle in my eye.

I hope she continues to do better and I will continue to dwell on the victories instead of the negatives. This verse has crossed my path twice today and it is a promise I will repeat.
Psalms 147:3 "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds!"

Monday, December 15, 2008

Monday's Update

Today was my second first day of work. Everyone has been so kind and thoughtful. I have already called my dad twice this morning. Each time I hear his voice I start to cry a little. I also talked to the nurse and mom had a good night and was getting her breakfast. I hate thinking that someone else has to feed her. I wish it could be me or my sister or a family member. She must feel so helpless not being able to use her arms. Not only that but hello..we’re Italian we use our hands when we talk.

I am hoping today she’ll get into a regular room. Yesterday when I left her she had the TV on and had just finished watching the Falcons win in overtime. She said that she wanted something on and football would be a good way to doze in and out. We said she did that anyways on a Sunday. She at least asked to have the TV on-that means her interests are peaking a little.

I got an email from one of the ladies in my parents Sunday school class and every day they have someone visiting Dad this week and bringing food. It is so comforting to see that Dad won’t be alone every day. Also they had a few people going to see Mom too!

This morning I read a little devotional and it was based off this verse:
Luke 2:11 (New International Version)

11Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord.

It was actually amazing to see how the Christmas story is relatable to my own life. Each day Christ is born in our life. When we rely on him in joy, sorrow, pain, fear, confusion, etc.. He is reborn. He has been born to you and me! He is in my life through this process and will be my Savior, Christ the Lord while I hurt and feel scared or alone.

I know this Christmas will be different but all I care about is being with my family and hopefully getting my parents to see each other by Christmas. I wouldn’t ever pick this to happen to me but if it had to happen then maybe Christmas is the perfect time so I can realize that Christ has been born to me, to help me heal and to help my family heal.

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Saturday's Update

I was able to sit with Dad for most of the morning. Blake, Amy and I got a lot of little things done around the house and I made a calendar and schedule for visitation for both parents and FOOD!!

Sometimes I wonder what the early church did without casseroles! I am sure they ministered to each other in other ways but it is amazing the amount of food we have in the house. At least I know Dad will not go hungry this week.

We had to make sure Amy made it safely on the road. It was so hard to say goodbye to Amy. I felt really little at the hospital today. She still has the ability to make me feel safe in only the way an older sibling can. I felt like even though all week long I was keeping up with all the paper work and asking a ton of questions, with her out of the room I felt really small an shy. I miss her already.

Blake and I got to St. Mary's around 1:30 or so. Mom's sister Anna and her son Clayton were there so that made me feel good. She had been sitting in a chair for a bit and eaten a little lunch. They took her off the morphine drip today and no more IVs. I think each of these things are little victories and when I am out of the hospital room I can celebrate them but being in the midst of all her pain I am so overcome with sorrow.

I let her sleep for a good bit while we all went out to eat and then I got to spend about 2 hours with her before going back home to Dad. I always seem to loose it when we have to leave her. I don't want to leave her side. I wish I could just freeze time and split myself in two. I want half of me with Dad and the other half with Mom. I want to stay by their sides until both are fully recovered. Blake read Psalms 23 to us tonight. I was so thankful he was there to be the stronger one so I could just cry for a bit.

Mom seems so brave too. She just keeps saying she wishes they could give her a new body and when I had to tell her that her middle fingernail from her last manicure was finally chipping after all this she just laughed and said "well wouldn't you just know it!"

She is to remain in the NCCU till Monday and then hopefully be moved to regular room. Maybe by that point she can have some flowers and photos and stuff from home brought in. None of that is allowed in the NCCU.

I hate that tomorrow is Sunday and I can't believe a full 7 days has passed since we first found out about the accident.

Before the accident my Dad asked for an old Ginny Owens CD for Christmas that had this song on it. Never have the words been more true! I am definitely getting him that CD.

If You Want Me TO

The pathway is broken
And The signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to

Chorus:
Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone

ya oh oh no

So When the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering that Your love put You through
And I walk through the darkness If You want me to

cause When I cross over Jordan, I'm gonna sing, gonna shout
Gonna look into your eyes and see you never let me down
So take me on the pathway that leads me home to you
And I will walk through the valley if you want me to

Yes, I will walk through the valley if you want me to

Friday's Update

Yesterday was a long emotional day for me.

We spent some time with dad in the morning and then my sister and I wanted to ride to the hospital to see my mom. I had not seen her since Wednesday morning and my sister was leaving today so she wanted to see Mom one last time.

St. Mary's is about an hour from my parents house. We got there after lunch and the reality of my mother's pain hit me when I saw her. She has every possible thing hooked up to her and she looked so sad. I felt like every hopeful and joyful verse I had read the night before immediately left me. But both of us stayed as strong as we could for my mom. We found out that she would be having surgery that night so we both decided to stay in Athens.

We called and checked on dad and knew he'd be alone for a majority of the afternoon. This was also hard for us because we had not yet left him alone either. The nurses told us we should probably leave the ICU for a bit and let her rest. Fortunately a friend from Samford lives outside of Athens and both my sister and me went over to her house and took a break from the sterile environment of the hospital.

It was nice to see her home decorated for Christmas, listen to Christmas songs and play with her six month old. For a moment it felt like we were just in town to visit a friend and not there for other reasons.

We headed back to the hospital and saw mom before pre-op and then sat in the waiting room and prayed. Mom could not be put under because she had already had surgery not but 24 hours before. So they just numbed her arm. The surgeon said she was a good sport and joked with every one in the operating room. He said that although her wrist was properly set it had become pulverized in the midst of all the other trauma and required 2 pins. Unfortunately, mom had developed a rash to the foam rubber under her soft cast and he didn't feel good about putting a hard cast over that.

So we got to see her one last time after surgery and Amy and I prayed with her before we left. I hate that this weekend is almost over. It has been the fastest and hardest week of my life. I know my sister is sad to leave but she is a mom herself and needed to get back to her family.

When we got home we all read the story of Lazarus in John 11. And noted that Jesus wept. He cried because people he loved were hurting. He mourned with them. He sees the bigger picture and knew he would raise Lazarus from the dead but he also knows that his children hurt in their journey and he hurts with us. What a wonderful knowledge know that our God is with us in the midst of our pain and we have a High Priest who does empathize with us.

Blake came over late last night (he got accepted to his program for his 3rd year!-YEAH) and we will go and see Mom again. It may be my last time before I go back to Birmingham tomorrow. I'll try and post later.

Love y'all!